Mar 31, 2008

Umbrella



If it rained today
i’d leave my umbrella home
Nothing should be between
Just the drops and me

No rain


........if it rained today ,
i would go out for a walk.
but it didn't .....

So no rain drops
in my face

photo by Brittany G




Mar 30, 2008

Feather's voice

There are time we discover within us something needs to come outside. We try to restrict that urge but that "thing" is so wild that nothing can keep it silent.
The message use a whirlwind as a medium and escapes. The whirlwind take us and lead us to the top of a mountain, where the distance between Here and There becomes lesser.
There are times the rider-message tames the whirlwind and from the mountains top’s a beautiful song rise to the sky But some others times our taming abilities are not strong enough and instead of the song we need to sing , a cock’s crow comes out of our mouth.

photo by Hamed Saber



Yi, in line 61.6 talks about that. Whilhelm translates it as “ Cockcrow penetrating to heaven. Perseverance brings misfortune”. Some days before, pondering on that line in Clarity among other things discussed there , Charly translate this line as "Feather's noise climbs to sky. To persevere, ominous." . I loved that .



photo by Lady-bug


How pleasing would be if we could speak with a feather voice and hear the other’s feather voice too. To see the unwritten, to hear the untold. But with such a noise around us , how to trust the power the feather has. We want to reach the other, to be heard, to share that “thing” we just discover or just talk. Maybe sometimes talk about the obvious but still the need to share is huge. And we talk… we talk… we talk. It hasn’t to do with bragging, showing off, or being insincere. Maybe its more about our effort to overcome all the disturbing noises that cut the message’s trip from here to there. Maybe because we are used to turn on the sound because the ears we wanted to approach couldn’t here low noises, or couldn’t understand the message so we had to talk… to talk… to talk.

Yet sometimes this is not necessary. When we are attuned with the other, too many words diminish the value of the message and maybe instead of coming closer we become more distant. From the other and from us. But those times are rare, when we trust the power of feather’s voice and believe that it can climb to the heaven. Those times require caution and strength to be free of bad memories and old habits and a clear mind to understand the actual size of the situation and harmonize with it.

Time to turn off the voice… already said a lot .

Whirlwinds….. not yet tamed.

Mar 29, 2008

Medicine

Photo by saÐ FέeLiήg™

She was playing, running in the room. She felt on furniture and hit her leg. Felt down and start crying. Not a serious injury, just in a sensitive spot. I kneel, took her in my arm and hug her. Tried to calm her. Told her how much I can understand her pain because I have also got hurt in the same place. “It’s an awful pain", she said crying. “Yes, I Know but it will pass in a while”. Really?” she asked but she couldn’t believe it. She trusts me, I know that, but you know how it is when you are in great pain, it fells like it will never go. “Yes it will” I assured her, hold her tight in my arms, touching her, talking with a calm voice and of course kissed her in her knee. After a while, she felt better. “It doesn’t pain that much now” said to me with a smile in her face. In a few minutes she got up and continued to play.

Now, I need a hug. A big hug.

Mar 28, 2008

Tell me...

The soundtrack of this night.
Thunders and lighting (Pantelis Thalassinos)

Enjoy it!




lyrics Thunders and lightning

Tell me, whose hand spilled ink
Over the scroll of our destiny
Wiping away the port and course, the beacons and shore?
Which compass'’ black needle
Will ever point to hope,
over the expectation of an unknown land?

Like thunders and lightning
In the very heart of an unsuspected summer
Came that cursed moment
Like a snake, a scorpion, a dagger
It rushed in my heart to pour out its venom
Thunders and lightning…
Our lives long for a miracle
For an angel to proclaim happiness and to avenge
To join those parted once more

Tell me, which of the planets is it, that like a dark magnet
rules over our lives, setting them off orbit
and steals away our dreams stealthily?
Tell me, which whirlpool has swallowed our stern?
To which gloomy rocks is it dragging us
right into fate’'s nets?

Mar 26, 2008



Just another day that everything is going wrong.
Sitting in the edge of the chair .......
I hope, that in the end of the day, I'll say that. Lol

Breath in.... breath out...
Breath in.... breath out...
Breath in.... breath out...

Mar 25, 2008

Wine


There is a draft blog about LiSe’s website. I really don’t like the word “website”. I prefer the word “hug” because if you read it, feels like a big hug, always there, to speak to you directly in your heart. But I talk about it another time.

My last blog, without going into details, was a big step for me. And we some of us take that big step we feel a little bit numb and there are thoughts of going back. I’m not talking about remorse, but about that uncertainty being on an unknown territory.

An what I do in such times ? I ask Yi !!!

So I asked Yi to talk to me about my later blog and It replied
61.2.5.6 to 24 Inner truth and Return

Line 2 of 61st Hexagram is one of the most beautiful lines of the Book of Changes.


A crane calling on the shady Northern slope.
Its young joins in singing.
I have a good wine-cup,
I will empty it together with you.
LiSe says about those lines.

61.2 The roots of every interaction are deep inside. If your words and actions are a true mirror of what lives in your heart, they will be creative and able to stir up a reaction in others. The greatness of an artist is in the first place determined by his faithfulness to his truth, and only secondly by his talent.

61.5: Having truth, then one binds. Without fault
61.5 Who is true can also recognize truth in others. He can make real and deep
contact, and he can avoid all harmful and needless influences. The ability to
find the right people and avoid the wrong ones is one of the greatest assets in
life, surpassing the best education, the most abounding riches.

61.6: A drawn-out sound ascends to heaven. Determination pitfall
Do not dissect truth too much in words or ideas. Before you realize it, you live up to great words instead of simple intuition, to beautiful ideas instead of simple experience. Give your emotions a fair chance to live life without giving it names.

In her 24 - return to your own town, she says : Follow your own road, your own Tao. Only by being oneself over and over again, one fills in one’s place. Like the sun gets it’s meaning from creating day after day, year after year. Who follows his Tao, can be relied upon. Everything he does has the same base, how divers it may be. A Tao can only be followed if one flows along with it. Trying to stick to one road all the time will not work. Every Tao always is a never-ending succession of days and nights, of coming and going, of cycles, endings and new beginnings. Moving in cycles, eternally, that is what Tao looks like.

I’ll leave you to enjoy those beautiful words ….and I’ll return..
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Mar 24, 2008

i am the clay


A piece of clay
Amorphous mass

Clunky hands
Came to carver
They left without
Licking into a shape


One-eyed sculptures
Couldn’t hear the pain
Of an captive -fire
In a mis-shapen clay

Soul’s dim voice
couldn’t find a say
to draw the soma
and show the way

carvers took her
and shape a body
unlike the one
the clay was made for

a dried clay crying
for her malformed soma
Alone in a dark room
Waiting in a coma



Familiar sound
of steps coming closer
First time they are comings
Or always were there?

The wet fingers touch her
They know where to go
Their moisture wakes
foreshorten desires

Her thirstiness is frighting
the attraction is strong
She lets, she defies
around the spot of release

The fingers are touching
The clay turns wet
Wants to surrender
but “ifs” blocking her

“i want You to be my Sculptor
to take me in Your hands
to carver my clay
my soul and my soma”


She lets, she defies
What if he doesn’t want ?
She lets, she defies
around the spot

Mar 21, 2008

Mar 19, 2008

Learning to fly


.
In her dreams heard that voice

"Come to the edge," He said.
She said, "I’m afraid."
"Come to the edge," He said.
She came.
He pushed her ... and she flew." *

Sometimes we just need that little push. Being a few steps before the edge, we wish that someone could be with us to help us do that step to the unknown. Maybe we already know that we can fly but this hand we feel in our back, the trust that penetrates our soul, like an electric current runs in our body , reaches at every spot our fears and hopes are hiding , trims our fears and awakens our hope.

The Hand knows that although we insist on be grounded we are determine to try … to fly. And we know that the Hand knows. It sees the wings ,those the shadow of the doubt forbid us to see. . That’s why we climbed together, up there, to the mountain’s edge. We lying that we want to go back, and the Hand knows that. It sees in our eyes the trail on the clouds we have imagined. And push us.


The hand pushed her, from the safe ground to the void. The soul wrapped with tension at the point of no turning back. Too late to grab that rock and climb back to the safe. The irresistible sky, that’s what she wants to seize

"Come to the edge," He said.
She came.

The Hand pushed her…. She wanted to fly, so she let the hand push her.



-----------------------------------------------------------------------
* The “dream” is based on a poem of Guillaume Apollinaire

Mar 18, 2008

Map Beat

photo by fdecomite
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To a Yi Forum
You make my Map blinking
&
my Heart beating
Thank you !!!

Mar 17, 2008

Teacher

Once I have listen to an interview of a very significant professor with a lots of titles and distinctions here and abroad. He was asked which title makes him fell satisfied for all his effort. He said something like that: When I met old students of mine after many-many years and they call me Teacher. A student of mine once told me, “Teacher, I miss you a lot but at the same time I don’t miss you at all because you are always here”. When I’m given such a title, when I’m called Teacher I think, Hmm, maybe after all, I have done something in my life. I believe, this is the thing that make me keep going and trying harder”.

For me those are the “real” teachers. It has nothing to do with titles, distinctions, and acquired knowledge but with this special wisdom of one who helps the student to discover its own teacher somewhere inside. (grown up ????)


The teacher I’ll talk you about, claims he is ignorant and his ignorance make me to want him as my teacher. You may ask, what one can gain for an “ignorant teacher”. Maybe it looks like a contradiction but trust me, it isn’t. I always admire those people that like Socrates believe that the true wisdom is knowing you now nothing and he knows nothing, that’s why he keeps searching because the true knowledge comes to each of us when we realize how little we understand about life, ourselves, and the world around us and he knows that.

He says that the qualities of a student are far more important than the qualities of the teacher. A great student, an exceptional one, will learn from everyone and everything.
Maybe he has his reasons for saying that but the view from here, from the student’s side is that a student to be great, need to be inspired from their teacher. To feel that they believe in their abilities, trust them, and that their goal is not to teach them but help them learn.

I could say more about teachers and student or teaching and learning but I won’t. I feel the more I say the more I go away from the real thing. I prefer to stick to my simple version. Teaching is an art and the teacher I’m talking about, is a real artist.


Photo by A Different Perspective




Mar 10, 2008

Borrowed



"Sometimes you leave something behind in order to move forward, and then you get to a place where you need something you had back there, though not all of it.

They leave a wagon behind because they had to cross a mountain. But once over the mountain they needed wood from the wagon to make a boat to cross the river.

So, they went back to the wagon to cross the river." Candid


Sometimes, in your way, you find something that though it is not yours, it could be. It’s your thoughts, your feelings. It’s simply you. There is not need to describe it, to explain it, to analyze it, even if you want to talk for hours about it. You just walk on those letters and the fog goes away.

They are borrowed words, yet you can keep them.



Mar 8, 2008

Magical Gate

Some time ago , my little niece and I, went to a store to buy her a present I had promised her. It was not the first time we went there, we go quite often to buy food. The store has those automatic door and when we were near them they opened . She look at me with wide opened eyes and told me. Look !! Those doors are magical !!!

From my self-made- kind-of -–dictionary Magic : You can’t grab magic with the interpretation of magic, neither with the description of interpretation of magic. Either you sing or shut up. You do not say what I do is singing. “Elytis”


A friend of mine said, “Magic can only be experienced in a state of madness….” I can relate to that. I had some moments that some people could describe as madness, foolishness or more mildly irrational behaviour. Then, for me something magical happened or I let something to happened . What exactly happened or how isn’t that important to me.
Neither to her. Her body and the magic eye joined their forces and turn a common door to a magical one. They together open a way to the toy’s department where her present was.

The passage is there, behind those closed doors and when our body and the magic eye become one those door will open. And then you don't say "what I do is singing". You just s i n g.

phot0 by gotjosh

Happy Birthday


Happy Birthday !

Missing you. But this is 't something new for you. I always telling you that . Maybe not with this words but you knew that.
I'm geting used to your absence ... but I still miss you.
I'm not angry with you anymore. I told you that but you wasn't here. I have told you a lot of things. Those I was hiding from you when you were here.
I don't hate you. I never did. You knew that, don't you. I was just missing you.

I wish you could hear the things I am telling you , about then. But you are not here.
I wish you could stay a little bit longer, I wish I could have talk to you a little bit earlier.
I wasn't there and you are not here.
I can find you out there but you are here . So, from here to there ..
Thank You
Happy Birthday.
Wish you well.
Take care of my friend
Good night

Mar 7, 2008

The Angst of Choice


The road forks
And now what she sould do?
Turn to the left …or turn to the right ?
Take the high road … or the small road ?
Take the easy path …or the difficult one ?


Standing at the crossroads struggling for direction
And a big road sign says “You are here ! In the Angst of Choice”



She is tired and wants to go home. The urge shows the easy road. Its comfortable, short with the least resistance. It is the one the most traveled. Everything a traveler might need is there. A place to eat, a place to have a coffee, a place to rest. A well-organized path. Tempting isn’t it? All she need is to go home and she is so tired. Seems like the right choice but why she doesn’t steps in?
Her mind points that road but her eyes are turned to that little path. The road not traveled.

Fear says “what if you get hungry? is there any food ?
What if you get thirsty? Is there any water?
And when the sun is too hot or the rain too strong where will you go?
Is there any shadow or a roof to protect you?
She listens to the Fear. He speaks rational and he promises safety and a smooth trip.

But why she doesn’t step in? She feels something holding her and let her make the step. It’s a child holding her heart. “Your Heart want to go this way” tells her and points to the little path. Come! We will travel to the places no one has traveled before, we will discover things that you have never be told . .

What if we get hungry or thirsty ? she asks. .Maybe Fear is right ,she thinks. I show you where to find food and water but you’ll have to trust me. .
What if you get lost. I don’t see any signs and barely looks like a path.
Its your path don’t you see that ? Its you and your steps
And it is your decision.

They are standing at the crossroads struggling for the right direction.

The Woman, the Child and She, in frond of a big road sign

“You are here ! In the Angst of Choice”

Mar 6, 2008

Manuals & Friends



Which way?, originally uploaded by .Leili.

Somewhere there was a discussion about Self-improvement books. I’m a little bit skeptical about those self-improvement/development manuals. Being in a phase of “going or not going out of the gate” I think in a stage like that, one has a lot of questions, tries to find solution. Those books definitely are full of answers but one must be very careful what to consume. Sometimes our urge to find a solution, to get quickly out of the courtyard leads us to take the first thing we find in front of us.Since I have read only one or two of those books ages ago, maybe I’m not adequate enough to make any judgment about how valuable or not are they and if the help us to find our answers or just adapt some ready-made answers/behaviors. Does those books helps us to go out or by getting through that gate we enter in another courtyard? Just wondering.......

Facing a difficulty, although I don’t see in a positive way all those solutions at the same time I’m in a dilemma if I’ll use one of those “easy” solutions. I’m inclined not to use but still the temptation is there.

I asked Yi about that .

What if I do ? Yi said 63.4 . “The finest clothes turn to rags.Be careful all day long..”

What if I don’t ? Yi said 48 to 7 : My Well.

The water in my well , are some literature books, poems, songs, images, sounds, memories, dreams, stories, myths, heroes from my country’s mythology and of course some significant-to me- people. It’s that interactions, those healing relationships where you can hear the other and be heard and learn to hear yourself. It’s that we share in our walks. Serious stuffs, funny stuffs or nonsense

My resources, those small or bigger things significant or less significant gathered together, they make a skein of thread like the one Ariadne gave to Theseus to help him find his way out of the Labyrinth after killing the Minotaur.

Mar 3, 2008

To whom it may concern

.
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I love when you are right and I'm not.
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Note to self

Note to self : “ You’ve got to find what you love !”


I quote some parts of Jobs speech just in case forgot them....


Connecting the dots
Again, you can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something — your gut, destiny, life, karma, whatever. This approach has never let me down, and it has made all the difference in my life.
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Love and Loss
I'm pretty sure none of this would have happened if I hadn't been fired from Apple. It was awful tasting medicine, but I guess the patient needed it. Sometimes life hits you in the head with a brick. Don't lose faith. I'm convinced that the only thing that kept me going was that I loved what I did. You've got to find what you love. And that is as true for your work as it is for your lovers. Your work is going to fill a large part of your life, and the only way to be truly satisfied is to do what you believe is great work. And the only way to do great work is to love what you do. If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on. So keep looking until you find it. Don't settle.
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Death
Your time is limited, so don't waste it living someone else's life. Don't be trapped by dogma — which is living with the results of other people's thinking. Don't let the noise of others' opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.
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You know something. I have some good friends that already have told me that. Those people are already in my "Joy List" and the funny thing is maybe I'm in somebody else's list because I have told them the same words.

...Hmmm , have to think about what I just said.
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Mar 2, 2008

Grinia

I've been trying to write for days but the words aren't coming easily and the blogs are still in the draft area. There is that phrase of Elytis stuck in my mind “the vacuum will be there as long as you don’t fall into”( Το "κενό" υπάρχει όσο δεν πέφτεις μέσα του)

Yes, its true but its requires a deep breath and a big jump. One wants to do it but the other strongly resist. Seems they need more time and effort. Or it is just less effort ?
Wonders….

Being in a “grinia” mood lately, yesterday wanted to explain to a friend of mine the meaning of the word “grinia” which is not just complaining, at least for me . Couldn’t find a satisfying way to explain it till I came across to an article of Nikos Dimou with the title : The metaphysics of "grinia" .Wouldn’t wish for something better !!!

I used to read Dimou’s book in the past so I stayed at his blog to read his stories.
There was a blog about Steve Jobs. Following the link I read “ You’ve got to find what you love” Chuckled…. Seems that the universe tries to say that to me with myriad ways but I can’t listen for some reasons. I smiled and replied “ I know, I know, just need so more time”
...I thougth I heard a loud but loving laugh from out there ...

Steve Jobs' commencement speech at Stanford College ends with those lines "Stay Hungry. Stay Foolish. And I have always wished that for myself. And now, as you graduate to begin anew, I wish that for you. Stay Hungry! Stay Foolish!"

That is so funny !!!! I feel embarrass when I can’t control my hunger and my foolishness and now that man’s advise is “stay Hungry.Stay Foolish”. To be honest this is not the first time that I hear that. A good friend of mine has told me lots of times but I keep sending him my “grinia” about my hunger and my foolishness

Will I stop bore all of you with my grinia about those things? Well, sorry I can’t make any promises . I need that grinia for a while to consume the not ‘s from my grinia "statements"

Oh , and can you keep a secret ? I like being hungry and foolish but you can't find easily people that can understand that.